When your spouse said, "I Do," he or she probably never imagined what that simple statement would entail. They married you, and your diabetes—for better or worse. But here's the good news: your relationship could be the secret to living successfully with your disease.

A 2002 study found that a good marriage can help the person with insulin-treated diabetes adjust to the demands of their disease and improves diabetes-related quality of life. Diet, exercise and adherence to doctor's recommendations were all better for those happily married. (Marriage did not seem to affect blood glucose control or adherence to blood glucose testing.) The study, “A Prospective Analysis of Marital Relationship Factors and Quality of Life in Diabetes,” was published in “Diabetes Care.”

Tackling diabetes together
A lifelong illness like diabetes requires significant lifestyle changes for you and your significant other. You need to eat right, stay active, take your medication and keep your blood glucose, blood pressure and cholesterol under control. And that's on top of handling all the other things in life! That's why you need your partner's support.

Here are some creative ways you can engage your partner in your diabetes management:

• Share a meal plan. Buy and prepare diabetes-healthy foods together. Look for ways to modify favorite recipes. Take a cooking class together. (Use our Meal Planner and Recipe Library to make things even easier.)
  
• Exercise together. Take walks. Go dancing. Commit to an exercise class together. Agree to exercise at specific times, such as before or after work. Since exercise is known to be a strong anti-depressant, these commitments can make you fit—and happier in your relationship.
  
• Get the best of stress. Learn a deep-breathing technique. Talk about your fears and frustrations. Watch a silly movie. Schedule a spa day—or better yet, give each other a massage.
  
• Live (and love) without limits. Plan a trip. Pursue a new hobby together. If diabetes has affected you sexually, talk with your partner—and talk to your doctor. There are many causes for sexual problems. You don't have to give up a close, intimate relationship. (Find out more about sexual issues for men or women.)

Helping your partner help you
People that care about you, whether it's a significant other, family member or friend, want the best for you and want to help you manage your diabetes. But they may not have the knowledge and tools. These tips from the National Diabetes Education Program might help.

• Learn about diabetes. There is a lot to discover about living well with diabetes. Attend a class alone—or with your loved one. Search the Internet (and take advantage of the vast resources on this site). Ask the doctor or diabetes educator how you can learn more. Read one of the many excellent books on diabetes management, such as those featured on the American Diabetes Association Web site. Use what you learn to help your loved one!
• Understand your partner's diabetes. Each person's experience with diabetes is different. What things are hard for them to manage? What things are easy? Learn about the things they face, including blood glucose monitoring, diabetes medications—and how to respond to potential diabetes emergencies. Be aware of possible complications and help remember recommended tests and check-ups.
• Find out what your loved one needs. Try asking these three questions—and really listen to the answers. What do I do that helps you with your diabetes? What do I do that makes it harder for you to manage your diabetes? What can I do to help you more than I do now? Diabetes affects you, too. Telling your loved one how you feel can also help.
• Offer practical help. Besides emotional support, find practical ways to be helpful. Pick up a prescription from the pharmacy. Pack a healthy snack for your weekend hike. Watch the kids while your partner meets with a dietician—or takes a bath!
• Get help. Others with diabetes can help you help your loved one. Find a diabetes support group in the health section of your newspaper or on the Internet. Ask your health care provider about ways to get help if your loved one is sad or depressed.

Work together to make these changes and you may find that besides controlling your partner's diabetes, both of you feel supported—and stay healthy!

Julie Steele, MPH, is staff writer for OneTouchGold.com.

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